On May 12, 2013 "Cochran", someone who may have been considered the most unlikely threat on the reality t.v. show Survivor, won a Million dollars. If you are fan of Survivor, you saw John Cochran in his first season being bullied by other contestants and too self-conscious to take his shirt off. This year's season he came back with a vengeance baring skin and taking no prisoners - becoming the second player to ever play a "Perfect Game", receiving no votes against him at Tribal Council and winning the jury vote unanimously. He still appeared to be the same red-headed, pale, skinny, Harvard law student, but something had changed from his last experience. In his words - "I feel like last time people thought I was worthless and I started to believe I was worthless, but now I am feeling more confident... the fact that I was able to succeed was remarkable to me."
I have had many conversations with people who share with me their incredible talent or unbelievable ideas. I instantly start seeing dollar signs in front of them. As we begin to talk about how we could easily make a business out of that, I am often met with a very similar response. Suddenly, what I see as the small details of implementation appear like mountains to my counter-part. And then it is said, "I don't know who would even buy that anyway." I began to notice over the years that what separates this individual from the entrepreneurs I work with already in the trenches, is that they lack confidence... not necessarily in the idea, because they had enough confidence in it to create it... but, confidence in themselves. Entrepreneurs tend to personalize what it is they are selling and it becomes an extension of themselves, many times to the point of a parent-child or matrimonial relationship. So the anticipation of rejection of an idea or talent is akin to preparing for a break-up or great loss. Because of this many "pre-entrepreneurs" don't even start.
Does this mean that people who lack personal confidence or self-esteem cannot be entrepreneurs? NO! But, acknowledging this hurdle is one of the first important steps to success.
Often our weakness can be our biggest strength if we let it be.
Did you know that "Shark Tank" star and angel investor Barbara Corcoran, who admits to insecurity being a daily struggle, says that "the biggest challenge in business is not competition; it's what goes on inside your own head ... insecurity makes you run, what's wrong with it?"
I have had many conversations with people who share with me their incredible talent or unbelievable ideas. I instantly start seeing dollar signs in front of them. As we begin to talk about how we could easily make a business out of that, I am often met with a very similar response. Suddenly, what I see as the small details of implementation appear like mountains to my counter-part. And then it is said, "I don't know who would even buy that anyway." I began to notice over the years that what separates this individual from the entrepreneurs I work with already in the trenches, is that they lack confidence... not necessarily in the idea, because they had enough confidence in it to create it... but, confidence in themselves. Entrepreneurs tend to personalize what it is they are selling and it becomes an extension of themselves, many times to the point of a parent-child or matrimonial relationship. So the anticipation of rejection of an idea or talent is akin to preparing for a break-up or great loss. Because of this many "pre-entrepreneurs" don't even start.
Does this mean that people who lack personal confidence or self-esteem cannot be entrepreneurs? NO! But, acknowledging this hurdle is one of the first important steps to success.
Often our weakness can be our biggest strength if we let it be.
Did you know that "Shark Tank" star and angel investor Barbara Corcoran, who admits to insecurity being a daily struggle, says that "the biggest challenge in business is not competition; it's what goes on inside your own head ... insecurity makes you run, what's wrong with it?"
So how do you start a business if you have a lack of confidence?:
1. Think about your great idea, your incredible talent - What is it that you love about it? If it's a product or service, what problem does it solve or improvement does it make? If you can answer these questions then you should remember that this was YOUR idea, why are you doubting yourself now?
2. If you feel overwhelmed, understand that starting a business is a one-step-at-a-time process; everything doesn't have to happen at once. First step - make a business plan!
3. Believe in what you have to offer, concentrate your efforts on making it the best that it can be and partner with people who are good at the parts of business you lack understanding or are unsure about.
(I love to walk new entrepreneurs through this process and provide the services they need along the way so they can concentrate on what it is they want to actually accomplish)
1. Think about your great idea, your incredible talent - What is it that you love about it? If it's a product or service, what problem does it solve or improvement does it make? If you can answer these questions then you should remember that this was YOUR idea, why are you doubting yourself now?
2. If you feel overwhelmed, understand that starting a business is a one-step-at-a-time process; everything doesn't have to happen at once. First step - make a business plan!
3. Believe in what you have to offer, concentrate your efforts on making it the best that it can be and partner with people who are good at the parts of business you lack understanding or are unsure about.
(I love to walk new entrepreneurs through this process and provide the services they need along the way so they can concentrate on what it is they want to actually accomplish)
While inspiration gives you the extra gumption to bust through walls, you need to balance it with humility -- to know that to make something unbelievable happen, you have to ask for help.
Ingrid Vanderveldt
4. Expose yourself to rejection - present your idea or sample to 10 - 20 people and ask them to be honest.
Don't ask family - they will either just tell you what you want to hear and you won't trust their praise or their criticism may make you feel resentful, in which case, you won't trust that opinion either.
I recently read an entertaining article "5 Reasons Why You Should Seek Rejection" by Robert D Smith about how at the point of almost giving up he turned his sales around by trying to get rejected 30 times a day, this exercise increased his sales to the point where it was hard to get a single "no".
Don't ask family - they will either just tell you what you want to hear and you won't trust their praise or their criticism may make you feel resentful, in which case, you won't trust that opinion either.
I recently read an entertaining article "5 Reasons Why You Should Seek Rejection" by Robert D Smith about how at the point of almost giving up he turned his sales around by trying to get rejected 30 times a day, this exercise increased his sales to the point where it was hard to get a single "no".
Every one of the world’s greatest visionaries has gone through some significant adversity that would stop most other people in their tracks. If it were easy, after all, everyone would do it. The key is to understand that if you really want to make something happen, you can. I am a walking case study that truly anything is possible.
Ingrid Vanderveldt, CEO of Austin, Texas-based Ingrid Vanderveldt LLC, which aims to fuel the entrepreneurial success of a billion women by 2020. Read more: http://www.entrepreneur.com/article/225695#ixzz2U9AIShXQ
5. Decide what your end game will be - I recall a story of two women trying to get a startup off the ground and after a year of trying to get financing, money was running out. One of them was working double shifts as a nurse to back the fund-raising efforts. They were running out of options and facing failure. They made the decision to pick a goal and an end date. If they didn't have X amount of dollars by a certain date, no matter what, they would throw in the towel. They experienced incredible release once that decision was made, and every phone call no longer felt like the thing that would make or break them. And yes, they met their goal!
Since hearing this story I have applied the same metrics setting method to my tough decision making and have found the principle to ring true. It is no longer so personal. You try your hardest, you do the things you need to do and what happens on that date, happens. It is not a great personal failure, it just wasn't meant to be and you don't end up throwing more money out the window than you should. However, most of the time the relaxation that comes from knowing there is an end allows your mind to focus on the tasks to meet the goal instead of the emotional distractions.
I believe we all can make a comeback like "Cochran" in our lives, whether it is personal, business or both.
My favorite consultation calls are with entrepreneurs, who after an honest look at where they are at compared to the average startup, just need a listening ear and pep talk to keep them going. They often already know what they need to do next, but just need someone to give them permission to keep believing in themselves... it is soon after that the next big milestone is achieved!
by Rebecca LeClaire - Website Design Company Consultant & Online Business, SEO & Marketing Consultant
This article can also be found on Simply Woman Magazine http://www.simplywoman.com/what-survivor-can-teach-you-about-confidence-in-business/.
Since hearing this story I have applied the same metrics setting method to my tough decision making and have found the principle to ring true. It is no longer so personal. You try your hardest, you do the things you need to do and what happens on that date, happens. It is not a great personal failure, it just wasn't meant to be and you don't end up throwing more money out the window than you should. However, most of the time the relaxation that comes from knowing there is an end allows your mind to focus on the tasks to meet the goal instead of the emotional distractions.
I believe we all can make a comeback like "Cochran" in our lives, whether it is personal, business or both.
My favorite consultation calls are with entrepreneurs, who after an honest look at where they are at compared to the average startup, just need a listening ear and pep talk to keep them going. They often already know what they need to do next, but just need someone to give them permission to keep believing in themselves... it is soon after that the next big milestone is achieved!
by Rebecca LeClaire - Website Design Company Consultant & Online Business, SEO & Marketing Consultant
This article can also be found on Simply Woman Magazine http://www.simplywoman.com/what-survivor-can-teach-you-about-confidence-in-business/.